Facial affect models are trained almost entirely on adults, yet are increasingly applied to children in education, health, and developmental research. We present a controlled, multi-model audit of five AffectNet-pretrained expression models (EmoNet, EmotiEffLib, DDAMFN++, OpenFace 3.0, LibreFace) on children, across four child image datasets, the AffectNet-8 validation set, and two spontaneous child video datasets, through one shared harness. Three findings emerge. First, the child gap is model-agnostic: every architecture degrades from posed to naturalistic faces and shares the fear$\rightarrow$surprise confusion. Second, it is concentrated and corroborated across all five models: open-mouth faces (read as surprise, correlating with the AU26 jaw drop) and South-Asian children degrade systematically, with a smaller averted-gaze penalty, while closed-mouth faces, White and Black children, and direct gaze do not; the bias tracks expression morphology and specific populations, not skin tone. Third, the gap is diagnosable: a linear probe on frozen features reaches 0.75-0.91 on unseen children versus 0.48-0.66 zero-shot, so it lies largely in the classifier head, not the representation, whereas dimensional valence/arousal regression degrades sharply under domain shift. Building on this, recalibrating only the head on a little target data recovers $+0.13$ to $+0.28$ on the two largest child sets across all five models at negligible adult cost, though the gain is in-distribution and does not transfer across child collections. We will release the harness, per-sample predictions, and analysis code; the child face data stays license-locked and is never redistributed.

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